Hai DMA

I have been negligent about posting, but I did have an out of town guest this weekend and have been busy at work. I didn't even get around to reading my mom's bio for her 50 year high school reunion until today. It's kind of funny reading it and seeing where my place is in all of her life. And I still don't believe she went to Berkeley in the 60s and never did drugs. I mean really.

I'm two bad news days away from hiding my money in the mattress. Though I have a feeling the cats would figure out how to get it out and buy some caviar with it. But that might be a better investment than just about anything else at the present date.

I got some travel books for Spain this past weekend, woohoo. Only six months until our trip.

Plausible Deniability

I've never been a good roommate person, that is, someone who likes having roommates and gets along well with them. Pretty much the only person I was ever able to live with without fighting with a lot was my ex. I'm still not sure how that worked, but it seemed to work for a while. Obviously, there were other issues, but we could live together just fine. Now, I just have two fuzzy roommates, Kiki and Teddy. Don't get me wrong, I love them, but they never do their share of the work. Not only that, but lately, they have been doing more of their share of mess.

Dogs are very good at looking guilty. Now, do they feel responsibility for their errors? I'm not sure, but they always look like they are penitent. Whereas cats are very good at looking like you are at fault. Lately, when I come home and there is vomit all over my bedspread, both cats look at me like, "why did you throw up all over the bed?" They also look at me with the excuse of, "yeah, this other cat snuck in during the day and threw up everywhere." Or spread fur everywhere. Then, when I was stripping the bed to put on clean sheets, I walked by the bathroom and saw that "someone" had made a huge crap outside the litterbox. That sneaky third cat keeps coming in, even when I'm at home, because surely Kiki and Teddy denied all knowledge.

Yes, they are both going to be politicians when they grow up.

Stop The Insanity

It's been insane at work. Around now is usually our busiest time of the year anyway, but this week seems particularly chaotic. It doesn't help that my poor co-worker is out again and scheduled for more surgery. He seemed kind of spacey on Friday, and then left early, and has been sick since then. The dude can't catch a break, seriously. Even though we are so busy and I'm totally overworked, I still feel bad for him. So he's probably going to be out for a while, and my boss talked about bring NB back in. Just say no to the nutbar. Instead, we will probably try to get someone else. Hopefully someone less of a nutbar.

In addition to wearing my name tag, I am now wearing my badge around my neck on a different string. I also have a USB thumb drive on one of these cords, and the keys to my desk. I kind of feel like a techie version of Flava Flav with a bunch of random bling hanging around my neck.

Working all weekend makes you feel pretty much like you don't have any time to relax. When I got home Sunday, I did some laundry and some bits of cleaning, but I didn't have energy for the whole thing. Which is pretty bad since my friend Dennis is coming from out of town to stay with me this weekend, and my house is seriously a sty of cat fur and random papers. There is a half of a Splenda packet on the floor that I haven't had the heart to pick up because the cats seem to enjoy batting it around so much. But yeah, I should get to fixing things up a little. Not tonight, but sometime.

Working For The Weekend

A month or two ago, my boss asked me to work overtime this weekend, and I said I would. Because, a month or two ago, that didn't sound that bad. And I knew I'd be making overtime. Yes. I think I'm worth my time and a half rate, at least. But I didn't really think about working Saturday and Sunday, and then not really having time off. I'm only working half days, but still, in between volunteering at the Humane Society and sleeping, I'm not really going to have much of a weekend.

At least I do have this Friday night, and my new favorite show on BBC America is on. Well, I also am starting to love Gavin and Stacey too. But Star Stories is just freaking ridiculously funny, emphasis on the ridiculousness of celebrity lives. And they mock celebrities in British accents. Hilarious. I'm thankful for Friday night TV.

Things That Make Me Sick

This post that Kitty put up about something that happened in her area. I can't look at the photo of this poor starving dog without wanting to cry. People can be vile.

The economic stuff is making me nervous. I'm not really an "investor" per se, but I have one of those 401ks at work, and I know I picked the option for long-term investments. I'm not really planning on retiring for at least thirty years, and the way the Social Security is going, closer to forty. Still, if the American economy totally tanks, I don't think that's going to affect me well. Or anyone I know. The only good fall out that I did hear was the economy in some European countries I plan to visit might also be poorly affected. Hopefully just enough to make my travels cheaper, and not really harm anyone.

And the thing that made me the most sick this week was what a woman in therapy told us this week. She's one of those tiny women, probably under five feet and around ninety-five pounds. Her husband, who was so nice for thirty years, is having some sort of issue, mid-life crisis or whatever and ran off to Europe for a while to shack up at their vacay house there with some other chick. So, she followed him, irate that he'd be parading this new trollop around her friends and family in the area. And one night, he got mad at her, and beat the crap out of her. Like, I said, she's very tiny and looks fragile, and of course he's some big over six foot tall guy. Even without that, it would be horrible disturbing, but I worry he did some permanent damage to her. She's still bruised and in pain, and it's been about a month.

She kept saying, oh he's never laid a hand on me before. Like that excuses it. Or it matters. No one deserves that. I could probably talk a few people in my therapy group into forming a vigilante squad. Yeah, probably not a good idea, but maybe it would get rid of that pain in my stomach and my fear for this woman.

Um, Ew

We have three sinks in the women's bathroom, and one of them hasn't been working for a week. They are supposed to be automatic, and I'm guessing the sensor isn't working. Today, in the sink that's not working, there was a big pile of short black hairs, kind of like what you would have in the sink after shaving your legs. So, was someone shaving their legs in this sink? And then didn't clean it up? More disgusting, if they were shaving their pits, or possibly their crotch region. Ew. If the water was working, I'd run water over it, but I don't really want to touch someone's hairs like that.

Sometimes, I'm wondering, is this really a bus stop and not a place of work? Because the bathroom has more of a bus stop appeal to it.

Circle of Friends

I went to Susannah's sister-in-law's baby shower yesterday, and she had easily at least 30 friends there. Many of whom she had worked with, some of whom were childhood friends or friends of her husband, but it seemed like at least three times as many friends as I could come up with. She's really a lovely person, and obviously a good friend and very social, but I was trying to imagine the amount of time I'd need to devote to maintaining that many friendships. I was a bit envious, but then also thinking that I just didn't have it in me.

Of course, her definition of friends might be different than mine, that is, she could have less barriers than me and get closer to people, or make more room for friends in her life, or just she lives in a more social city than me. Or everyone just came for the wonderful cupcakes that Susannah picked out. Ha ha. I also have a lot of good friends who don't live in my city, and that would thin the herd a little.

Thinking about it did make me wonder if I'm feeling more anti-social lately. I guess I am. I'm not really sure what happened, but I think the last person I was trying to be friends with was the NB at work, and that didn't turn out well. I might just be feeling a little bit blue because I'm almost out of Wellbutrin and am taking a half dose until I can get a refill.

And then when I think I should be nicer and more open to people, I heard the foul-mouthed woman braying outside at someone, calling them a "fucking asshole" really loudly and repeating that phrase over and over again. It's not like I don't swear, but I think stuff like that loses its impact if you keep repeating it. Also, I don't really want to listen to her at all. When I start hearing stuff like that, I either think of moving or sitting on my balcony with a shotgun and polishing it. Does one polish a shotgun? I'm not sure.

What Lies Underneath

Since I got this underwear free from Victoria's Secret, I figured I'd try something different. I ended up with a boyshort. I have to admit that I hate looking at this kind of stuff on their website, because the woman have no stomach fat and you have no idea how it's really going to fit on someone who isn't tiny and tall. The boyshort on me looks nothing like it does on the woman in the photo. Admittedly, I think this kind of underwear is cut for someone with a more boyish figure, with a smaller hip-to-waist ratio than mine. It's comfortable, but it seems very high on the sides and lower around my butt and stomach. I don't know if I'd buy this same style again, but it is kind of intriguing. From their underwear, I usually get the high cut brief which seems to stay up on my hips (which I found a problem with the bikini ones with my wide hips). I am not too into wearing thongs, particularly since I wear jeans most of the time at work, and having denim on my butt-cheeks doesn't sound all that super. And the low-rise thing just doesn't work for me. How about you all? Do you buy fancy underwear in every color? Or do you just buy big packs of it from Costco? What's in your pants? Ha ha.

Using Coupons

The best food is free food. Seriously. A new Chipotle opened in my neighborhood and they sent around cards for a free burrito. I got a burrito with barbacoa yesterday and it was delicious. Doubly delicious because it's free. Their burritos are about six bucks plus tax, which is not cheap, but it's definitely tasty. I was kind of thinking of trying to raid all my neighbors' mailboxes to get more of these coupons, but I'm pretty sure that is illegal. I don't want to go to jail for a bunch of free burritos. Because I doubt burritos are on the jail house menu.

Last weekend, I went to the mall because I had a coupon for free underwear from Victoria's Secret. They send me one of these coupons just about every month, and I get enough free underwear that I will probably never have to buy underwear again. There was this group of angst-ridden teenagers behind me, the ringleader mad because one of her friends wasn't hurrying up with her purchases before they went out to their party (or whatever) and it was just kind of hilarious listening to her conversation, like a TV show or something, but I was worried if I turned around to look at her, she might cut me or yell at me because she was amped up. There were tons of people at the mall, which makes me think either the economy isn't doing that badly, or this area is suffering less of a recession. Or teenagers have no better place to go on a Saturday night.

Baffled Technology

I work in IT. I have computers at home, computers at work. I have been working with computers for most of my life. So when I have computer problems, I can't really blame technology. Or can I?

My therapy group has had an intersession when my therapist goes off to her yearly month in Europe, and I've been charged (well, really I assigned myself to it) with setting up dinners a few times during that month. The first one, I sent out an Evite and it went out without a hitch. The second one, for some reason, no one got the Evite, and they only got the reminder notice that I sent out yesterday. Since the dinner was supposed to be today, most everyone already had plans. I still can't figure out what went wrong here, but it's annoying. Thankfully, our therapist returns next week, so I can deal with some of my annoyance then.

Oh, one person wrote me to meet for dinner, so I'll be meeting her.

Trash Talk

Yesterday morning began with me hearing one of my neighbors saying something horrible to someone. I didn't get all of the words, but the gist was that the person they were talking to was horrible and lazy and never moved their ass when the speaker wanted them to. It was just vile. I don't know if they were talking to another person or an animal, but I'm guessing this woman was talking to her child like this. It just horrible to have to listen to, even if it wasn't directed to me in any way. I think talking to anyone like that, even an animal who can only really get the intonation, is just ... evil. I can't think of a better word to describe it.

It has been super hot here, and I went out in the heat of the day to go to Target. I decided to go to the gigantic two-story Target that is a bit further from my house, but I figured they'd be more likely to have the right color dye for my hair. I can get it at a regular drug store, but Target is cheaper. And this lovely two story Target was filled with screaming children and with parents screaming at them. There were a few lovey-dovey couples walking around, holding hands, and I hoped they were visiting the birth control aisle during their visit. I don't think it's really a problem of having children so much as it was just freaking hot outside, and everyone was walking around miserable.

Then when I got home, another one of my lovely neighbors was unleashing a string of profanities. I'm not sure to whom or about what, but it was just ugly to have to sit there and listen to it. Not like I don't swear, or that I'm offended by swearing, but every other word out of her mouth was the f-word and it seemed like she was incapable of anything else. I locked myself in my apartment for a few hours after that, avoiding people.

NB Reverberations

I mentioned earlier that I've done a lot more socializing at work this past week. I work with a pretty large group, and my role involves interacting with a lot of different people. Some are smarter and some are dumber, some are more annoying and some are easier to get along with. I wouldn't say that I hate anyone or love anyone either. I used to have that discussion with the nutbar temp (NB) who seemed to either love or hate people (a symptom of borderline personality disorder). And as being single women, well, we'd talk about all the guys. She was always talking about how she'd totally date this guy or that guy (usually the married with kids ones, go figure). I can't say there's really anyone in my group that I'd date, married or not. I mean, it's possible, but not probable. I certainly wouldn't be dating a married w/ kids guy.

One day, when NB and I were walking out of the building after work, we ran into this guy we work with. I had said before that I think he's cute and seems very happy with his wife and child to NB. Somehow it came up that he was saying something about his looks, and NB said, "Fluffy and I both think you are cute." I was like, um, what the hell. Then, the kicker, she says, "we both think you are HOT." I was trying to backpedal this and ignore her and ignore him and change the subject all at the same time. I didn't want to say, oh no I don't think you are hot, but really, I don't think he's hot. I think he's a nice guy who seems like he has a nice life that he's happy with. And if he isn't, well, hell, that's his business.

Anyway, he has always been a little bit friendly and flirtatious, but nothing out of the ordinary, but I sat next to at an event this week, and he was very friendly, trying to connect with me, talking about shows he likes... well, it's probably just friendliness. I know some part of me would have been flattered and maybe interested, even if I wasn't really serious about dating someone married. But I realize that I'm not flattered by that kind of thing anymore. Just because someone is interested in me in some way, or shows me some interest, doesn't automatically make me interested in them.

It was an interesting realization. I wonder how much more fall-out from NB there will be. Hopefully it will be minor. It really does feel like a weight lifting off of me having to not work with someone so nuts every day.

Hail Fluffycat

One of those weeks with lots of lunch events, and lots of crapola going on at work. These things are good in that they force me to be more social at work. But I didn't have my usual salad lunch, which is really the main way I know I'm getting my fruit and vegetable servings. And also I've found, eating a salad makes you less sleepy in the afternoon than a sandwich does. The one salad that I bought to bring to work was expired by today, so I went over to Safeway to get a sandwich. I used to like this one sandwich they had, but it's missing from the list now. It had a bunch of olives and marinated artichoke hearts, and it was called something Mediterranean. I was then thinking oh maybe that "Hail Cesar" one would be the same thing, not really thinking that ceasar salad isn't really Mediterranean and it would just have ceasar dressing on it. I ended up getting the cobb salad one which was pretty delicious. Though as I said earlier, having a sandwich at lunch makes one more sleepy in the afternoon. I heard a rumor from my boss that I might get to leave early, which would be awesome.

I don't know why I've been kind of listless this week, but if I had to bet money on the reason why, it would be the heat. It's been about 90 every day in San Jose, though it does cool off at night time. It's still a bit tricky falling asleep in a still hot room.

Yes, this is the most boring blog entry ever.

Busy Like A Worker Bee

I have been ridiculously busy today at work but I have had a great day. The number one reason, the nutbar temp is gone. I didn't realize how difficult and unpleasant she made working here, but now that she's gone, I just feel relieved. I am slowly coming to terms with how many things that she "took responsibility for" around here, and how ridiculous that is. If we were some sort of consulting firm, that kind of thing might make sense, but the way things work in this IT is that we all try to help the customers and work together as a team. Team work was not something that she understood, and after a while, she just stopped asking me how to do things and made up her own solutions. Which were wrong. I don't know. I like to think of myself as flexible and easy to work with, but I might be kidding myself about that. I liked her better when she acknowledged that I knew what I was talking about, and when she stopped doing that, I stopped liking working with her.

Tomorrow, my long-ill coworker returns. Will he be here for just a few days then go back out on leave? It's possible. It has happened before.

What Exactly Does One Do On Labor Day?

It's the official end of the summer, all-righty, and is that why it's very warm outside and very sunny. Get with the program, San Jose.

I hung out with Susannah yesterday and we were talking about this time of year, and how it really doesn't bother me as much as some depressive people, because I've never really had seasonal affective disorder. Though I do wonder sometimes about renting a light box and seeing how well that really works. One of the joys of living in California, even northern California, is that winter almost never forces you to stay indoors.

The cats have been asking for dinner for the past hour, seriously. Just now, Teddy was crunching on some dry food and balefully looking at me like, "hungry cat is starving here, lady."

I haven't done all that much today, other than reading and doing some laundry. I really need to do some cleaning and all that, but it feels really pleasant just sitting here and not exerting myself too much. Yay for a restful labor day. I'll get to it all, eventually.